Procrastination
The paper or project is due tomorrow, and yet no or little work has been done. When the realization that the work needs to be done what happends next? Panic, defeat, mind spinning worse case scenario thoughts. It is easy to look at this and say this won’t happen again- and then again happens again and again.
For those who are gifted or have ADHD this can become a common scenario even into adulthood. There are times that the thrill of the rush can produce an adrenaline rush making the person feel alive. Then the rush goes away and all that is left are the feelings and panic.
If you are reading this, because I am talking about you or your child, first let me start with you are not alone. There are many surface level explanations that could be given, but my guess is that you want relief and not a bandaid fix to this.
Brain Development
There is a part of your brain that controls how a person processes time. It allows the person to “guess” how much time is needed to accomplish a task or to ascertain how much time has passed. For those with ADHD this can take longer to develop. The energy used to develop this part of the brain was taken up by the parts that control movement. So the energy and spontaneity are there but the part that processes time and the part that helps control impulses is lagging behind.
For this person, asking them to gauge how long a task will actually take can feel impossible. Their brains give them one number but reality is another number, usually much longer than they thought. For example, a person thinks a task takes 1 hour but in reality takes 4 hours. When reality takes hold, the panic and sense of defeat enters. The phrases “you should have known” or “why did you wait so long?” enter into the scene adding frustration and hopelessness to the mix.
Delayed Defeat
For others procrastination exists as the mind says if the task is not complete then failure has not occurred. By not starting the task then one has not failed in the task. Delaying the start means delaying failure. The mindset of failure is not an option enters the scene so no start = no failure.
Start!?
Then there are those who do not know HOW to start the assignment, project, etc. They know pieces of it- just not the beginning. In a world that says start at the beginning who would want to begin? Many who are gifted and/or have ADHD have asynchronous brains. This means that their brains do not work in the same order as everyone else. Maybe they know the end or parts of the middle, and that is it.
It’s Complicated
Three different reasons for procrastination with three different solutions. Until one knows the WHY one cannot begin to work in this area. I believe in doing root work and not bandaid work. Bandaids only cover up problems and are only meant to be there for a short time. Root work brings about the change that can last longer.
Depending on the reason leads to the solution. For some it might mean the use of timers (timers are my best friend) while others need to be able to produce products in their order and not necessarily the order it will come out. Still there are some who need to find the WHY for their definition of failure. Then there are those who fit into more than one category.
With Understanding Comes Peace
Understanding the WHY can lead to understanding one’s self. As this happens then the strategies needed to address procrastination can lead to longer, lasting change.
If this applies to you there is no shame in seeking out help for you or your child. You do not have to walk alone.